-
Up Close and Personal with Lammadonna
After months of trying, I've finally
managed to get an exclusive interview with the most powerful woman
on Lamma, Ms Yu Lai Fan. One balmy Tuesday afternoon, Feb 24, we
started our pleasant chat outside Spicy Island, ending 3.5 hours
later with al fresco dinner at B&B.
It took her friend
Pinky Chan (many thanks!) to introduce us and to interpret
between us, even though Ms Yu's English is OK for basic
conversations. We exchanged name cards (a still rare happening on
Lamma). Besides her heavily made-up district election campaign photo
on the name card's front, it was most impressive to notice the list
of 15 (!) official functions on the name card's backside, in
addition to District Council Member (Elected). Most powerful
woman on Lamma, indeed, at least in theory. But she's so low-key,
almost unknown to non-Chinese till
the recent
DC Election saw the photo above on posters and flyers all
over the island. I've had all her job titles translated (thanks to
Samson and Lily Li) and they're certainly a mouthful:
 Resident
Village Representative, Yung Shue Wan
Executive Member,
Rural Committee, North Lamma
Director, Primary
School, North Lamma
Vice-Chair, Tourism, Fishery and
Agriculture Industries Committee, Islands District Council
Vice-Chair, Lamma Island Area
Committee, Home Affairs Bureau
Honorary President, Marine Police
Youth Group
Honorary President, Scouts, Outlying
Islands
Honorary Advisor, Youth Association,
Outlying Islands
Executive Member, Sports Commission,
Outlying Islands
Member, Environment, Food and Hygiene
Committee
Member, Community Affairs & Leisure
and Cultural Services Committee
Member, Fight Crime Committee,
Islands District
Member, Democratic Alliance for
Betterment of HK
Vice-Chair, Womens Association,
Outlying Islands
Member, HK Women Alliance Group
Member,
HK Women Development Association
After introductions in Spicy Island, the three of us
retreated to the privacy of the harbourfront area of B&B Rest.,
where she later invited us for dinner, sharing all the food
and even paid for everything!
She likes me doing this magazine for Lamma (not sure if she's
ever read it, though) and we connected on our shared love of Lamma.
She laughed at being nicknamed Lammadonna, regarding it as
kind of a compliment. I have to admit to have been a bit biased
before meeting her. But after this interview I really like her as a
person. We got on very well, sharing quite a few laughs. She comes
across as a friendly, down-to-earth, honest, simple, unpretentious,
rural woman. After having been quite camera-shy before, she even let
me take these photos, without make-up, not even lipstick!
 Ms Yu Lai Fan was born in
the Lamma Clinic and attended Northern Lamma Primary School of which
she is now the Director. She's had a hard, poor upbringing, together
with 11 brothers & sisters, their parents selling home-grown
vegetables. Attending a Caritas middle school she went on to
complete Form 4; quite an achievement in her days when only very few
students attended university. But she stresses that she still loves
to learn, to improve herself, to study new things.
She's lived on Lamma all her life, loves the place and has
friends & family here. She describes Lamma people generally as very
nice, very sincere, very down-to-earth, the same way she sees
herself. Still being single and not afraid of dating. She'd even
consider going out with a Gwailo! But he has to own at least $6
million, she added with a hearty laugh!
But, in general, she seems to have very little contact with
non-Chinese Lammaites, unknown to almost all of them till the
DC election,
it seems. The only Gwailo she mentioned repeatedly as a "friend" was
Dan Peterson. But he says that he knows her only vaguely from some
govt. enquiries.
Since 1975/76 she's been helping Lamma people constantly,
especially with small stuff. She claims that people call her all the
time for help & favours, almost like a one-woman band, a Ms Fix-it!
Being an intermediary between the govt. and the local villagers, she
applies for govt. funds and facilitates for many local projects,
some big, but most really small. For example, she even collects
pension money from town every week to distribute to local elderlies
(who will probably mostly vote for her). In 1997 she went into
politics full-time, as an appointed District Councillor. Let's list
some of her more specific comments on local political issues:
 Typhoon shelter (behind library): Part
of Ms Yu's election platform was to enlarge it. She thinks it's much
too small now, needs more room for boats during typhoons and needs
to be "cleaned up", looking like a slum now. She couldn't believe it
and shook her head when I mentioned that I like it the way it looks
now, the stilt houses, the colourful boats, the romantic bay.
Actually, there'll be a photo gallery in the next Lamma-zine...
Helipad & Clinic: She was eager to point out the new
temporary helipad opening close to the clinic. She was also very
excited and happy to mention a video link from the Clinic to Queen
Mary Hospital that was just installed for emergencies. She didn't
claim the credit for these improvements, but it showed her eagerness
to improve local services and infrastructure for Lamma, working hard
to make life better for its inhabitants. It's just the details of
how to achieve these goals where opinions differ frequently.
Local Middle School: She's applied for it, fighting for
it, to be built near the police station in Hung Shing Yeh. It's in
very early stages now, applying for the preliminary location now,
many more permits needed.
Public toilet renovation: She revealed that it cost $1.5
million of taxpayer money! She used it as a "good example" that the
HK govt. is willing to invest money to improve the island's
infrastructure. She'd like to see a lot more of these improvements
and advises people not to resist them, not to refuse the govt's
generosity. Turning the govt. down on new projects repeatedly will
make them back off from sorely needed improvements, she claims.
Democracy Wall: I was enquiring who painted it over and
why it can't be used anymore for posters. She dismissed it by
pointing out that the wall looked so dirty before, especially to
arriving visitors! They "complained" about the ugly wall and the
posters falling down, messing up the street! In her opinion, it
needed to be cleaned up and "beautified", giving tourists a good
impression of our island. She dismissed the need for a public
message board.
Harbour reclamation: Basically, Ms Yu sincerely doesn't
accept the arguments against the reclamation, even refusing to meet
Save Lamma so far. She still sees their successful stopping of the
reclamation as a kind of bothersome meddling by foreigners who're
only living here for a short time. Me living here for only 2+ years
was laughed at (nicely) as "just a new arrival".
There was a plan by Save Lamma till recently of a raised wooden
road on stilts above the beach which she ridiculed as "chee seen"
and impractical. It would never be able to resist a really strong
typhoon which us temporary residents have never experienced yet. In
the end, this is not a disagreement fought with arguments only, but
with emotions & prejudices, on both sides, between modernisation and
protecting the status quo...
Ring Road: She's really pushing for the construction,
declaring it as important for emergency vehicles. She's argued in
the District Council monthly meeting that the ring road objections
of a small vocal minority do not represent the local views which are
mostly pro-ring road, she says...
She cannot understand all the objections and why people want to
turn down the govt.'s money to improve the local roads. She's truly
bewildered about Westerners who keep complaining about everything.
Why resist progress and development, especially when it's paid for
by the govt.???
We didn't get into details of the ring road as there were some
translation problems and Ms Yu's basic English is OK for simple
topics, but not for discussing technical details. But it seems that
they're improving the ring road plans now, following the recent
flood of objections. They're proposing to connect the planned
emergency access road to the fire station, for example.
 Basically, we have
a clash of cultures, world views and priorities here. She
didn't strike me at all as a cynical, tricky politician, obsessed
with self-interest and profit, but as a honest, open person. As a
life-long Lammaite, she tries to help to "improve" Lamma's
infrastructure, believing in development, modernisation, wider
streets, more buildings, more tourism, better business, prosperity
for everybody; like many rural communities around the world. I have
to admit that she's representing a majority of the locals, who voted
for her, after all. Democracy in action...
Ms Yu opened a new office at Chinese New Year, in the
former location of the "Lamma Gourmet", open during the usual office
hours all week. She's working with one full-time secretary & several
occasional volunteers. She's even got an English sign on her office
door now and you can stop by for questions & comments. But it might
be good advice to make an appointment by phone (not email!) and
bring along somebody bilingual for easier communication.
I took this great opportunity to present the
questions
from voters to her again, the SAME ones I asked both
candidates before the DC election. She promised several times to
answer them. Weeks later, despite several reminders, not a single
question has been answered...
Restaurant & Bar News ― March 2004
 One new restaurant is scheduled to open late in late
March (or April?): "The Full Monty" fish & chips take-away on High
Street. Review in next issue! The photo below shows just one of the
many local places also offering "Fish & Chips".
 The
delicious Indonesian take-away behind the Scorpio Business
Centre has closed, unfortunately. The owner and his Indonesian wife
have left Hong Kong, taking up a new job posting. Kumar has departed
from Y2IKEA a few weeks ago. Mark has left Aroy Thai,
again. Manager Keith will leave the Island Bar end of March
to run the entire large operation of an Australian Bar & Restaurant
north of Macau in Mainland China. Guess who'll replace him? Kumar,
formerly of Spicy Island and Y2IKEA!
 Bobsy the Bookworm
is working full-time on opening an up-market "health food"
vegetarian restaurant in SOHO, Central, in early April, called
LIFE. Catch a taste of it during the March
weekends in the Bookworm, as the new Canadian chef is in HK already
for an
Organic Orgy (click for more info). The
Deli Lamma put on the first wine tasting I've
ever seen in Yung Shue Wan, including a free wine snacks buffet, on
Feb 28. Have a look at the Deli Wine Tasting photo gallery.
Above left, one of Lamma-Gung's Deli Lamma favourites,
Chicken Supreme.
Please, let me proudly present: Lamma
Dining Tips for Parents, from the Funday organiser, my "Mr
Language Person" and occasional Lamma-zine proofreader, Doggy.
Plus a little food review from yours
truly about a new option for High Street "street food" (see right):
|
 Doggy:
Unlike HK side
restaurants, I can't really think of anywhere in Lamma where I
would be reluctant to bring the kids - everywhere seems to be
relatively child friendly, with high chairs and the like. The
main thing you have got to watch out for is the VVs roaring
past any of the roadside restaurants.
I've found the
Bistro is a good place for us to scoff and booze while
Kaia dashes about and gets under people's feet - at least it
keeps her occupied.
The Bookworm
is good because it has a selection of kiddies books for her to
pick from and there are usually other kids in there.
Of course, for
kiddie diversions the best has got to be the Concerto
(even if it is lacking in other ways), because you are right
there at the beach, and as long as they are in sight, the kids
will kick sand at each other for ages while you sup the
sundowners. They've got a good little area of kiddies slides as
well. |
Lamma-Gung - Amateur
restaurant reviewer
 I was staggering by Spicy Island at
11:30am, after finally rolling out of bed after a very late
night at the Sexy Biaatch party in Diesel's (photo
gallery in the next issue). I tried Spicy's Masala Dosa and
curry potato pancake (photo above) for a late breakfast.
It was so tasty that I stayed on
and had a proper Indian brunch, trying several dishes,
fried street-side. Plus lots of coffee, of course. Many friends
were passing by during my al fresco brunch, some of them
stopping by for a quick chat and fresh input for the
Lamma-zine.
At $10-20 per item these freshly prepared dishes are
great value. Well spiced, mouth-watering, succulent, but not
too hot. One of the two full-time cooks of Spicy Island is
preparing these original Indian delicacies on weekends and some
week nights. Try them when you see them.
Get quick, friendly, smiling
service from proprietor Amar Singh; enjoy one of the
best people-watching spots on High Street. A great but
little-known brunch location, opening at 11am.
I'm looking forward to Spicy's
Naan bread making demos on Sunday afternoons, starting
this month. Think flattened dough - similar to *real* pizza
making - swirling above High Street! |
For more restaurant & bar news,
presented as a photo gallery, including many recommended dishes I've
enjoyed personally this month, click on
Restaurant & Bar News - March 2004.
Tasting Deli―cious
Wines
The Deli
Lamma put on the first "Wine Tasting and Educational Seminar" I've
ever experienced in Yung Shue Wan, even including a free wine snacks
buffet, on Sat, Feb 28. A fun event with a crowd of "sophisticated,
cultured, wine-loving gourmets", with just a few freeloaders
sneaking in for free booze & buffet, like Lamma-Gung.
Have a look at the classy
Deli Wine Tasting photo gallery,
full of Savoir Faire. More tastings are planned to follow on
a monthly basis in the Deli! It's even rumoured that
other restaurants might follow this successful example. Click on the
poster on the right to find out if any of YOUR friends belong to the
crowd of "sophisticated, cultured, wine-loving gourmets"!
Dining Adventure in
Sok Kwu Wan
Photo taken
from Ling Kok Shan behind SKW, by Richard. Unobstructed view all the way to YSW and the power station!
Click on the name cards below to enlarge
them.
  After living in Yung Shue Wan for over two years,
I've finally made it over to Sok Kwu Wan. Following the tourist path
through the "other" famous village on Lamma Island, Lamma-Por and I
explored the well-known tourist spots and enjoyed a seafood dinner,
of course. Here's the
photo story of our little SKW Dining Adventure, incl. many
photos of the recently burnt-out, famous, 150-year old Tin Hau
Temple.
According to the Lamma Island Visitor's Guide,
Sok Kwu Wan is "a famous seafood paradise with
lots of restaurants along the shore area, and a wide variety of
seafood for your selection. Tourists also favour local specialty
food such as baked egg rolls, local spices, shrimp cakes and salted
fish. The sweet tofu custard and ginger-flavoured milk custard are
some of the most beloved desserts".
Another quote from an old friend of mine,
Knippy, who emigrated from HK to work for the
Washington Post. As ex-HKTB, he knows all too well how to
write for tourists:
 "But one of my favorite places to dine is in the wee
village of Sok Kwu Wan on Lamma Island, where a dozen small seafood
restaurants sit along the waterfront. A number of large glass tanks
line the street, each one alive with all manner of sea creatures -
lobsters, crabs, prawns, scallops and beasts that bear no English
name.
With a waiter's advice, you simply create your own menu. It will
then be steamed or stir-fried with a dash of ginger, garlic, sea
salt, fresh pepper and soy - freshness being the key culinary secret
of the Cantonese. The opening round of icy San Miguel beer is served
just as your first course arrives. Does life get any better?"
Click here for the Sok Kwu Wan
photo story.
Interview with Jean
Paul, manager/chef of Cococabana (see right) in Mo Tat Wan
(ferry ride or 20 minute walk from SKW) in the next issue...
Farewell to the Sweary,
Shouty Quizmaster
  Some Laudable Lamma
Luminaries are so famous & popular, it makes us mere mortal
Lammaites green with envy!
If I was leaving
Lamma, would they put on a huge party in my honour with TWO bands,
in "Lamma's leading hostelry, and also its oldest, liveliest and
nearest to the ferry pier" (according to their own ad banner above)?
No way, Josι!
"Good riddance!"
might be all the farewell I'd ever get!
Plus, Frazer got TWO original posters by
Harry, a 3-part photo gallery  and this feature story in
this Lamma-zine, all in his honour! He's so darned lucky! Why? Could
it be that he's just such a sweet guy? Nah! Or could it be that so
many people are happy to see him finally leave? We'll never know...
In the meantime, have a look at photos of his Leaving Hoedown,
called "Ho Down" (spelling was never one of Frazer's many talents).
Plus a few historic photos of Frazer's many community activities on
Lamma Island:
Member of THREE Lamma bands (YSWankers,
Gaelic Gall and Ex-Cons, see Harry's Poster Gallery), Quizmaster in
the Island Bar for 5 years (see right poster),
Treasure Hunt organiser, Women's Dragon Boat helm,
Meatfest chef in Aroy Thai, very active member of Lamma.com.hk under
several pseudonyms, fishy Live Fish expert (Garoupa above left,
beware!), Executive Director of the International Marinelife
Alliance, a man of way too many talents & passions...
He'll be sorely missed by his many
friends; even his foes, as it won't be easy to find another
formidable, sarcastic & quick-witted opponent like him. Well, he's
just an email away:
Email Frazer. Now that he's left for a new life in Sydney,
you can tell him what you REALLY think of him, without fear of
retributions, hehehehe!
Here's Frazer's very own farewell
message, written for the Lamma-zine. Short'n'sweet from a man of
action, not of many words, a not-lonesome cowboy riding into the
sunset; plus a friend's message.
Afterwards, don't forget to click on any of the 3
posters above for the party photo
gallery!
|
 Frazer:
Dear all,
Many thanks to
everyone for some great times in the last 9 years on Lamma. For
those of you who turned out to make our leaving party one of the
best seen on Lamma for a long time, you wont be forgotten. I
will miss Hong Kong terribly, it became my home very quickly,
and was a real wrench to leave.
Cheers, Frazer |
 The Devil's Beard:
It was indeed a
sad day (for some) last Sunday when Frazer finally left the
Island (Bar). When asked how he would be remembered, regulars
were unanimous and said that he wouldn't be.
Close friend and
confidant, Clive B.F., a local joker, said he could now drink in
peace as he would stop being mistaken for Frazer and being told
it was his round.
Frazer earned a
unique reputation with the local fishermen as the helmsman for
the dragon boat teams and was fondly known as "dong shut lo" or
"get lost" because when he helmed, that's what they did.
Local celebrity
Mr. Frank Paul was quoted as saying "Wasnt he French?" |
Lamma Accident &
Emergency Committee
 On
Feb 9, I posted the appeal below from the newly formed LAEC on
Lamma.com.hk, calling for info on David Slough's death for a pending
coroner's enquiry. They managed to collect a lot of valuable info up
to the deadline, but they are still interested to hear about any
medical emergency you have experienced. It's all for the common good
of improving the severely deficient local A&E services. Help to save
lives!
In the few months since David's unfortunate death, it seems that the
govt. has been rushing ahead with some initiatives of their own,
probably pushed by the public outcry of locals and the media alike
about the inadequate services. The temporary helipad in the
reclamation (see below) was built and opened in record time a few
weeks ago. On the right, the (maybe first) MedEvac helicopter
landing there, shot from Sampan Restaurant.
There's also some great news from District Councilor Ms Yu Lai
Fan, who revealed during my interview with her, that there's a
video link from the
 Lamma Clinic's treatment room to
Queen Mary hospital now. A medical member of LAEC spoke to the
Clinic doctor on March 12, who confirmed that they've had it for the
last month. But when the LAEC medical member asked to see it and how
it worked, the doctor refused, saying "This is
not an exhibition!". Let's hope the video link is still
operational and the staff know how to use it in any emergencies!
|
Lamma Accident &
Emergency Committee:
At
approximately 6pm on Monday September 8th, 2003 long-time Lamma
resident David Slough fell in a serious accident outside
his apartment at Tai Wan Old Village, Yung Shue Wan. David
subsequently died from his injuries.
Reports at
the time of the accident indicated that failures in the
procedures of the Accident & Emergency (A&E) services for Yung
Shue Wan - an issue that has long concerned residents of the
Island - may have significantly contributed to David's death.
In order to
clarify the evidence and to ensure that the Coroner's Court has
the fullest information and recommends any possible improvements
to the A&E services for Lamma, witnesses to the accident and
subsequent events are invited to make their information known on
a confidential basis to the Lamma Accident & Emergency
Services Committee (LAEC).
The
Committee, a group of concerned residents, has been created with
the sole objective of ensuring that A&E services provided for
Lamma are much improved and attain the highest standards
possible.
If you have
any contribution to make to the evidence on this tragic accident
please make it known by noon on
Sun, Feb 29th, 2004 to
laec@lamma.com.hk or phone 6147-5140. |
To bolster
the effectiveness of this campaign to ultimately upgrade Lamma's
A&E services (Ambulance, Fire, Police), residents are also
invited to provide clear and concise information regarding other
medical emergencies in Yung Shue Wan and other villages which
may reflect on deficiencies, including those of the Lamma
Clinic.
Your
assistance will be greatly appreciated by LAEC, whose membership
includes Mrs Mui Ying Slough, David's widow.
LAEC Spokesman:
A group of
long-time Lamma residents last month formed a 'Concerned
Citizens' group, the Lamma Accident & Emergency Committee, to
look into how to ultimately to improve the level accident and
emergency procedures for the island.
LAEC
continues to seek information on recent medical emergencies that
could have received more prompt and concerted action on the part
of the authorities so the situation can be improved.
If you have
any such information please send it to:
laec@lamma.com.hk |
More Than Just "The
Cat Artist" ― Diane Huntoon
 The Lamma-zine Artist of this Month is a friendly
lady who's become well-known for her imaginative, colourful,
semi-abstract paintings of cats in many poses. She used to live in
the artist's loft high above Y2K, but has opened a proper studio in
Central now. Still a busy full-time art teacher right now, she'll
make the daring transition to full-time painter this summer. All the
best of luck, Diane!
 Check
out her new online gallery where you can notice that she has a much
wider artistic range than most people ever suspected, an amazingly
wide variety of techniques and subject matters, from YSW harbour to
pure abstracts. Click on any of the two paintings for
her gallery. Her new official
website is in progress by yours truly, to be announced very soon.
Most paintings are up for
sale,
email Diane directly.
|
Artist's Statement:
Painting is a
very important part of my personal identity. I may move around,
or my friends and family may circulate in and out of my life,
but I have cultivated a relationship and dialogue with paint
that I expect to continue for the rest of my life.
My focus is on
the contemplative act of painting and how contemplation can
bring us closer to a sense of truth in life and its creative
mysteries. The act of painting definitely taps into some kind of
energy and I believe it is akin to a spiritual endeavor. I am
familiar with this now and that is what I love and am drawn to.
I enjoy the sensuousness of paint and prefer non-referential
painting more than pictures filled with a lot of content.
However, I try not to limit myself. Painting kind of reorganizes
my brain cells (back to normal) after daily exposure to the
crazy world of consumerism and political folly.
My favorite
artists are Franz Marc, Chardin, Picasso and especially the
quiet work of Giorgio Morandi. I enjoy immersing myself in art
history as it is enlightening to know what others have done.
But, in essence, painting is in response to one's confrontation
with existence. It is a great companion on the road of life. |
A bout the paintings on this page:
All of the
paintings here were done on Lamma in the past 2 and a half
years. They are examples of the main images I usually focus on,
which include the stick figure icons, cats, and big abstracts.
The sizes range
from 8"x12" to 4'x6'. Prices start at $2,000 and go to about
$20,000. I am working on newer abstracts that I am very excited
about and are not shown here but will be on the new website in
April.
I am happy
to show my work to anyone who may be interested. Please feel
free to email me at
variousart@yahoo.com and to
make arrangements to visit my studio in Central, Hong Kong. |
Pinkyism ― a New "Evil
Cult"?
 It
all started when local icon Pinky Chan submitted a
long letter to the last Lamma-zine. The pinky-haired Divine Ms D
was so impressed & smitten with the letter that she started a new
discussion topic on Lamma.com.hk,
"Pinky
Chan rules":
 "Just read the new Lamma-zine
and I'm converting to
Pinkyism.
Anyone who can write this:
'China is shaped like a chicken. How
many air balloons we need to tear down one eagle? Guess? I dont
know. Have you tried it?' and admires
Bin Laden because he's 'physically
slim' has my undying love. You go
Pinky!"
In this issue, I'm happy and proud to present a true Laudable
Lamma Luminary, our local 3G (Great Guru Goddess), the
founder & mother of Pinkyism:
The Venerable Ms Pinky Chan!
 I've had the pleasure of meeting Pinky myself only
recently and we've shared a few meals, drinks & lots of laughs
together. According to Toad in the Hole, Pinky opened Lamma's first
hippy guest house, back in the days when she was a multi-dating "hot
chick". This put Lamma on the backpacker trail and started the place
we see today. All of us who love Lamma owe her a big debt of
gratitude.
 In ancient, almost biblical times, before
recorded history, she ran the (in)famous Banyan Cafι, a
temple of wild hedonism and freely flowing intoxicating liquid
sustenances. She grew wealthy as a landlord of ancient, often
"illegal structures" which she's saved from demolition. A
fun-loving, carefree lady-of-leisure these days, she's surrounded by
many friends & admirers (see above).
Devout, subservient disciples of
Pinkyism listen fervently to her almost daily sermons in
front of her local temple, Spicy Island, divulging pearls of wisdom
to all voluntary & involuntary listeners. Even the occasional (OK,
frequent) raunchy joke or colourful swear word escapes her blessed
lips, cheering up her happily grinning followers, amazed about the
sheer earthiness & worldliness of their admired idol.
 She's frequently traveling, at
her own expense, to spread her gospel to new areas, offering her
spiritual guidance to all heathens, steaming Bangkok last month,
freezing Calgary right now.
May she live long and prosper and entertain us for many more
years, hopefully guiding many more of us lost souls on our way to
the Nirvana of Pinkyism: a
devil-may-care attitude to the trials & tribulations of life, a
cheerful acceptance of the daily ups & downs, a Buddha-like serenity
in the face of adversity, plus a heart-felt swear word or two when
we need some urgent emotional release!
The all-new photos of our guru in this story of praise to
Pinkyism show her broad, serene,
Buddha-like smile, her hip fashion sense and her clued-in,
newly-found high-tech awareness (email
her!) with mobile & digicam (& protective Thai dagger!)
dangling on her neck (see right). Well, even Lammadonna was dressed
up all in pink for her interview, with multi-lingual Pinky
interpreting!
I've asked The Divine Ms D to share how she found
Pinkyism and the impact it has
had on her life:
|
As an object of
desire and breathtaking beauty, fans often ask me what its
like to have everything: high cheek bones, great hair and a
body that makes men weep.
But ladies
and gentlemen, secretly I have been nursing a large hole at the
centre of my being. A huge, echoing chasm that couldnt be
satiated, even by buying really great accessories. It was my
soul. Yes, my soul.
I had not always
been so spiritually bereft. As a youth, I would frolic amongst
the hassocks, carefree in my Sunday best. Then, one fateful
evensong, I was discovered in the vestry, sewing communion
wafers together to make a dissolvable bikini top. The ensuing
palaver made me turn my back on religion forever.
For many years
disco, cosmetic enhancement and Thai kick-boxing provided me
with all the moral strength I needed. But, as the world turned
sour in the Bush years of the early 21st century, everything
that I stood for began to seem frivolous and vapid.
Who could I turn
to? Who would guide me back to the path of righteousness? |
Then, in
January, I read Pinky Chans email to the Lamma-zine editor.
Like a pink glow from heaven, Pinky represents all that I
admire in a woman: shes barking and has unusual political
views but what do we care? Only a woman of true moral fortitude
would have the guts to smash up an ATM, piss in the street,
throw bricks through the windows of her own business, smoke
Buddha Sticks in front of the police box and, in acts of
extreme sacrifice, sleep with some of Lammas most famous
ex-residents.
As Pinky says, I
am a woman, I like to dress well, eat well, fuck well, sleep
well,..... I want to fly like bird, shit like bird, piss like
dog.
She does. And
she gets away with it, too. Whats more she's got great bone
structure.
Pinky Chan, you
are a guiding light to us all. |
 Did you recognise the "church windows" besides The
Divine Ms D's confession? Yes, I snapped them in a major local
cathedral of HK's most powerful Evil Cult, its millions of
worshippers all devoted to the all-powerful god Mammon, MONEY:
Standard Chartered Bank headquarters in Central (click to enlarge).
 So we can safely and definitely conclude that
Pinkyism is not an Evil Cult at
all, but just a harmless, cheerful, fun activity. It fits in so well
with Peace, Love, Lamma, it even pre-dates that slogan by
years!
On the
left, a "Happy Pill" dispenser from the Japanese chapter of
Pinkyism. Right, a devout
disciple (with bodyguard) at a recent
wild party in Pinky's honour.
Pinky has gloriously blessed the Lamma-zine with a promise of
becoming a regular contributor, in English & Chinese. Chinese
calligraphy
below by Pinky, translated as
The
Occasional Diary of Yung Shue Wan Girl. Click for the much
raunchier Chinese version of her English text below:
Stinky
Tung, give us back Lamma Island!:
|
Pinky Chan, starting a new topic on
Lamma.com.hk:
Become a shareholder of Lamma Island!
Can all Lamma residents become
shareholders of Lamma Island?
How can we
combine our financial resources, technological know-how,
cultural background, and the experience that we all have to
achieve this? Can we float Lamma Island on the Stock Exchange of
Hong Kong? Get rid of stupid Tung, become independent, so we all
can run our Lamma Island ourselves!
At the
moment, there is no international school, hospital, dental
service, pharmacy, theatre, public swimming pool,... Lamma has
nothing!! But Lamma is so big with plenty of sun and sand
God-gifted people artists and farties all
nationalities all backgrounds.
If we
achieve good financial backing, we can put all our money in one
pocket to invest and develop Lamma Island. If you dont have
money? Work some overtime for Lamma Island and exchange the pay
for shares!
Good or bad
idea?
Let Pinky know by clicking here! |
 Alan
- Moderator:
We wouldn't need
any financing. Just nationalise the power station and sell
electricity to HK.
We could also
raise crops of marijuana, coca and opium poppies, exporting
those we didn't consume to trade for beer.
 Norseman , confused member:
What's a fartie,
and am I one?
____________________________
Beware the
fury of a patient man.
 The
Rogue Sperm, new member:
Of course Norsey and a wet one at
that. |
Who's "The Sweetest
Motherfucker" on Lamma?
 The following story has been submitted by Lamma
newbie Ran (left), from his
personal Blog (featured before as Website of the Month): a few
unique impressions about his new life on Lamma:
(Text & pictures by
Ran, shot of Alain supplied by Island Gym)
"La'mah
doh mat'aau!
There is always the sudden steam off pigs' stomach as I walk past
the dumpling shop. On this small island where I live, Lamma, I have
to walk every morning to catch a ferry to Central Hong Kong. The
walk takes me by a store called "Brothers," where the gruffly tender
man is gently sitting with an encouraging word, be it for cider or
beer. He has 7 different kinds of kitty litter, but not the kind
that my cats crave.
"Crystals? Do you have crystals from California? The Japanese
ones smell too much like apples... Simian doesn't like apples."
 Keep walking, and you find other shops and 2 storey
blocks. There's Diesel's bar, the Thai place that sells skewers of
squid or chicken and spicy sauce, the shop where I buy water or
natural gas for the stove-top, a candy store. Various seafood
restaurants; one serves Japanese food, one sells Chinese. One makes
Indian food that ranges from the eye-wincingly bad to the lick your
fingers clean good. There are more, more shops, more junk. A couple
of Laundromats. There's also the place I go to twice a week, now
that I've started martial arts again.
At the Island Gym, I get to be whipped into shape by the
sweetest motherfucker you've ever met. He's a muay thai champion
of some international order, has won body-building championships,
and he's an imposingly-fit looking fella; marry that to a friendly
smile, and you've found the guy who got me so sore that it hurt to
hold up my arms, even after a week. We train to Eminem.
Ahh... Our little corner of industrial paradise. The pier is
where the nipple would be, the gym is where the hand is, and those
three smoke stacks are where the power plant is at.
This is me, and this is where I live.. ."
 This is Ran's face after Alain found out what his
student called him! Just kidding,
The Panther
wouldn't hurt a fly OUTSIDE the Island Gym. This great photo (taken
INSIDE the gym, I believe) is No 4. (Mar 11, 2004) in Ran's new,
inventive & imaginative self-photography series of
350
Rans - everybody's connected. It's titled
"Alain
N'Galani: fist; Ran: face; any questions?" No
questions, Ran, none at all!
This great photo - and future ones -
available on eBay, but only till Mar 18, in the following
category: "Home > All Categories > Everything
Else > Weird Stuff > Totally Bizarre". Appropriate category?
So You Think You
Can Pull? ― Dragon Boating
 DO
YOU WANT TO GET FIT WHILE SITTING DOWN?
DO YOU WANT A TONED TUMMY,
BACK AND ARMS?
Join the Lamma Dragon Boat
Team for this and so much more....
Yes,
the Dragon Boating Season 2004 has started up and training is now in
full swing! Check out the schedule of the training
sessions in the Lamma Events
Calendar. They're still looking for paddlers, I believe!
Their
brand-new website should be ready any day now, but in the meantime,
check out their former
website
on Lamma.com.hk, with loads of photos of the last four
seasons, their many triumphs & famously wild parties!
You
can discuss their progress and cheer them on in the dedicated
Lamma
Dragons forum on Lamma.com.hk.
Lamma Cricket Club
Falls at Last Fence
 I have a confession
to make. I know NOTHING about cricket, growing up in a place that
is sadly deprived of this most mysterious (to me) sport. Even
watching the entire great, 4-hour, all-cricket Bollywood flick
Lagaan - nominated for Best Foreign Language movie Oscar in
2001 - didn't do much to kill my total ignorance. Cricket's a lot
like baseball, isn't it? But the bats are funny-shaped, they have
their own language (Cricketish?) and it can take DAYS to complete a
single game!
Oops, sorry, I hope I haven't upset any LCC players
with this introduction. I wouldn't want them to chase me down Main
Street with their "funny-shaped bats." Anyway, I'm very happy that
our expert intrepid LCC Correspondent has submitted another
update on the progress & conclusion of the 2003-04 season, not
having to write it myself! All you many Lamma cricket fans out
there, enjoy! (All photos & captions by LCCC)
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Chilly cricketers during the interval
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Our intrepid scorer, Kim Leung, feeling a bit under the weather
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Last man out: Brad leaves the field with Al
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Cunning stunts: When hes not opening the Lamma bowling, Alec Price moonlights as a crash-test dummy
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LCCC - Lamma Cricket Club
Correspondent:
Lamma Cricket Clubs title aspirations fell at the last fence
to a six-wicket defeat by a strong LSW Warriors squad at Po
Kong Village Road in the islanders last fixture of the 2003-04
season. The loss came just a week after LCC had narrowly beaten
last seasons rivals, St Georges, by 11 runs at the same
venue.
On what proved to be the coldest day of the winter, Lamma were
put in to bat and got off to a promising start with a 39-run
partnership between Butt Hussein (14) and Derek Dexter Wintle
(25). Big Terry Pontikos chipped in with a handy 20 before a
classic Lamma middle-order collapse after Terry was caught
behind. |
Despite a
spirited last wicket stand by Brad Tarr (24) and Al MacMillan
(14 n/o) Lamma could only come up with a total of 144 runs,
which is never going to be easy to defend against a strong
squad such as Warriors.
And it
wasnt easy either despite Terry
taking early
wickets from catches off the bowling of Ian Beck and Hussain
and Ian off that of Sher Lama, Warriors proved impossible to
shift, taking the points with a six-wicket victory.
The result left Lamma out of sight of the
championship in a still respectable fourth place, regretting
missed opportunities from earlier in the season, and looking
forward to the HKCA Perrier Saturday League Cup/Plate
competition, which begins on March 6. Watch this space. |
From Hunter's Beach
to Helipad ― Reclamation Photo History
 For the first time in the
Lamma-zine: a photo history, putting photos from various sources
about the same subject into a sequence, showing the development of a
local landmark. The temporary helipad in the far end of the
reclamation was completed around Chinese New Year, so I thought it
good timing to put the very best of hundreds of photos into a
chronological order.
 Rarely has a local area been more
transformed than the former secluded, idyllic, sandy Hunter's Beach,
location of many a wild party or concert in Lamma's "good old days"
(as the old-timers keep on telling us), pre-Handover. Having been
reclaimed a few years ago, it has now become the location of the new
temporary helipad, used to MedEvac emergency cases from the nearby
Lamma Clinic. Let's look at the changes it has gone through over the
last 40 years: Click here for the Reclamation Photo History.
To
learn more about the many political & environmental controversies
surrounding the harbour reclamation, check out the
SaveLamma website,
several past issues of
Lamma-zines, plus the
Environmental & Political forum of Lamma.com.hk, of course.
|
One of the true pleasures of a home office -
besides not being "burdened" with a regular or substantial income -
is being able to watch the Academy Awards ceremony all morning.
Today, Mar 1, saw me cheering while Lord of the Rings: Return of
the King cleaned up, winning ALL of the 11 Oscars it was
nominated for.
This Shire comparison certainly
sounds like a possible topic for the Lamma-zine! Anybody want to
write it up? Just one of the many fun local topics one could
research, describe and illustrate... Suggestions are always welcome!
Hey, how many of the Lamma people on the cover
above did you recognise? Mouse over these "faces from many races"
to find out their names and occupations. Click on these faces from
many countries to link to stories and photo galleries in this or
former Lamma-zines where they were mentioned. Should I use YOUR face
in the next issue?
Worthy, substantial submissions will be offered
the choice of a great bottle of wine (2 bottles donated by
If you're not a subscriber yet,
Contributor:
Birds:
This mysterious, intriguing notice appeared on Feb 20,
taped to the outside of the govt. noticeboard close to the Policebox.
What could it refer to? What has Vincci done and why is he so sorry? I
posted the
Everytimeagoodtime:
"Second storey added to house a ParkN Shop"
A Cunning Linguist:
"Market where people can set up a stall and sell
trinkets, sarongs, and curried fish balls.
The Duckin' Diver:
"'Second hand shop' where you can go and buy back
all your stolen property. Apparently they'll deliver."
Publicity #4:
For a change,
let's talk search engines this time. Boring subject, I know, but
it can be pretty interesting using them to search for your own name or
somebody else's (Googling them)!
